blas·phe·mous™ (mychemical_lust) wrote in blowmeup_pretty,

  • Music:

eightyeight: left suspended in between


13 songs for Altair of Assassin's Creed


❝And suddenly I feel that I am suspended between the foulness of life and the cruelness of death; for I know that I have not even asked for much but the "beggar never gets to choose". I have not stopped feeling or hurting or anything, truth is that this pains me deeply; a burden that refuses to detach itself from me like a meddling leech.❞
- Y-Lai Le

Set in an alternate universe: Altair is a 22 year old college student struggling with both pride and guilt. After being in a horrible accident that left his best friend handicapped and his best friend's brother dead, he finds himself angry and alone. Angry at the world and at himself. But only he is the one who can lift his heavy burden - he must relearn how to live and move on, but most of all, he must learn how to forgive himself and earn the forgiveness of others.


Beat my bones against the wall
Staring down an empty hall
Deep down in a hollow log
Coming home like a letter bomb

Cold was the storm
That covered the night

You didn't really want to go out that night.
But Kadar was noisy and Malik was calling you
a hermit. Neither of which tickled your fancy
and next thing you know, fuck, you're in a shitty
club with blaring lights and music that sucks.


I want a girl who gets up early
I want a girl who stays up late
I want a girl with uninterrupted prosperity
Who uses a machete to cut through red tape
With fingernails that shine like justice
And a voice that is dark like tinted glass

She is fast and thorough
And sharp as a tack
She's touring the facility
And picking up slack

You take a swig of your beer. You're driving,
so only one tonight. Malik looks like he wants to
get wasted and Kadar only appears when he's on
the phone, disappearing again in the crowd on the floor.
That's when you see her. The girl from your math class.
She's looking kind of hot - what was her name again?


We are the boys from Little Eden
We are the heart of the Saturday night
We drink from the fountains off the fireworks
and off the sweat and bone for a better life

You're relaxed now. The music isn't so pounding and
Malik is becoming tolerable. You actually grin and wink
at the girl from class. She rolls her eyes and ignores you,
but that still doesn't swipe the smirk from your face.
Kadar comes up to the two of you at the bar and asks how you
like the djs on stage. You just grin and put a hand on his shoulder.
Dumb kid, he needs to get some real friends, but you
can't help but laugh.


There was blood and glass all over
And there was nobody there but me
As the rain tumbled down hard and cold
I seen a young man lying by the side of the road
He cried Mister, won't you help me please

You only had one beer, and that was hours ago. But
your head is pounding and everything hurts. You don't
understand what's going on and your vision blurs in
and out of focus. Who's screaming? What's going on?


Well, I wonder which song they're gonna play when we go.
I hope it's something quiet and minor and peaceful and slow.
When we float out into the ether, into the Everlasting Arms,
I hope we don't hear Marley's chains we forged in life.
'Cause the chains I been hearing now for most of my life.

Young boys, young girls, ain't supposed to die on a Saturday night.

You wake up - regain your balance and focus, and
everything is white. Your head is still pounding as
the doctor enters the room. She gives you a pathetic,
sad smile and puts her hand on your forearm.

He's gone - the kid, you can't even bear to say his name.
Let alone think it.
And Malik's unconscious - she said
they had to amputate his arm. You suddenly wish it was you.
Dead or with a missing limb, it didn't matter. Anyone but them.


Hello darkness, my old friend,
I've come to talk with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping,
Left its seeds while I was sleeping,
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence.

She leaves you in your misery. No one will come
to visit you. Not your old man.

Not Kadar. Not Malik.

You curse at yourself for idiocy, for your luck.
For the shitty car and the wet roads. At God,
wherever the fuck He is, for letting this happen.
To them. To you.


With the jobs I've taken
The bones that I've broken
Seems nothings the way that it used to be
But now it's over, I guess that I'm older
The proof is on paper in front of me
Write it down, sound it out
Oh, oh, oh, ohhhh
Make it loud, and make it count

You were allowed to leave after two days. Malik,
what's left of him, is stuck in that place for another
three weeks till he's allowed home. You went to visit him,
to apologize, to say anything, but the words were stuck
in your throat and all that exited your mouth was a gurgle.


Why won't anyone just close their eyes?
Could it hurt them to rest for a while?
Do they need their friend to be a lover?
Or a lover to be a friend?

Because I'm on my way to Hell.
Well, I've tried. God knows that I've tried.

The guilt eats at you. It eats through you.
You contemplated even going to the funeral.
God, funeral. You went anyway. Let them
hate you even more. You can deal with it, you've
always had to deal with it. But at least you can
say goodbye.

Rest in peace, my brother.


Now I'm ready to start
I would rather be wrong
Than live in the shadows of your song
My mind is open wide
And now I'm ready to start
Your mind surely opened the door
To step out into the dark
Now I'm ready

It's been a semester and summer - you don't see
him on campus till fall. You also hear his familiar
voice echo through the speakers of restaurant. He's taken
up his job again. You almost smirk and your fingers
itch to your cell phone. You know the station's number by heart.
If only you had the heart to speak to him again.


When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry

He sits behind you in your Philosophy class. Two
seats behind you to your left, actually. And you
still can't help stealing glances. At the angry
glares he gives you, or at the ghost of his arm.
The sight of both gives you an unwelcomed
sensation in your chest. The words you wish to say
are only hollow echoes in your head.


How many roads must a man walk down
Before you call him a man ?
How many seas must a white dove sail
Before she sleeps in the sand ?
Yes, how many times must the cannon balls fly
Before they're forever banned ?
The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.

Half way through the semester, you finally can't
take it anymore and you follow him after class.
He walks with a pride and arrogance you once knew
and you struggle to keep up. You reach for his arm,
but your fingers grasp air.

Malik, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. Please,
brother, forgive me.

You can't look him in the eyes as you cover your own
with your hood. You don't him to see how weak you've
become. But he doesn't say anything and instead pulls
you into a tight embrace. He was always stronger than
you. Always more mature. Always there.

He says nothing as you return his hold. Nor does he
speak of the tears you leave on his shoulder.

And that is all the forgiveness you need.


Have faith in me
Cause there are things that I've seen I don't believe
So cling to what you know and never let go
You should know things aren't always what they seem

I'm going crazy
Cause there are things in the streets I don't believe
So we'll pretend it's alright (pretend it's alright)
and stay in for the night
Oh what a world
I'll keep you safe here with me (with me)

Things won't return to what they once were. But you are
moving on - moving forward. You are learning to trust
others again, and they are learning to trust you too.
You have survived this leap of faith, and you will
survive whatever else will come your way.



This is Altair's mix, set in the same universe as my previous Malik fanmix.

BONUS: Altair is a waiter at Denny's*. He normally works the night shift/evening. He is known to normally call Mailk at the radio station and request shitty, 80's love songs. Safety and peace, bro.

*Denny's is a popular American diner-chain that is known to be open 24 hours a day.

And I know that Brian Fallon is the lead singer of The Gaslight Anthem, and that could be seen as having two songs from the same artist on the same mix, but what can ya do? Brian Fallon's acoustic version is so awesome and I think I like it more than the original anyway.

To view the complete lists of all fsts, click here

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x-posted: fanmix, fansound, nothingtrue, assassinscreed , & assassinsorder
Tags: !fst, fanmix: single character, video games: assassin's creed
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